Post by G on May 3, 2012 21:54:05 GMT -5
On one of Chris Jericho's days off, he's relaxing at home, living life away from Ground Zero. Knowing the strict deadline for promos for the Devil May Cry PPV, Jericho seems to not really care. Just then, a knock at his door occurs and in comes the Ground Zero camera crew, straight into his living room, his eyes narrow, and he stares at one of the guys. Knowing exactly what they're expecting, he sighs deeply and looks around his living room, spotting someone. Pride sets in and an instant smugness overcomes Jericho as he nonchalantly props his legs up on his coffee table and begins speaking.
"Let me guess, this is about Devil May Cry, right? That's convenient, because I was just about to go there and speak my mind on my match, but since you so kindly showed up at my home, it saves me a trip."
Once again, Jericho looks around, knowing camera's are rolling, he shakes his head and clears his throat sitting up straight and crossing his arms, staring directly into the camera, speaking back up.
"Fatal Four Way, Chris Jericho, versus Kane, versus Randy Orton, vs Shawn Michaels. This isn't a big deal, but allow me to give you a history lesson. I debuted in Ground Zero, and I made an instant impact, I destroyed, CM Punk, and Zack Ryder, two people, who are now, nearly non-existent here. When I locked CM Punk in the Walls of Jericho, and he tapped out like a little girl. I sent a message, that was heard loud and clear, by the entire Ground Zero locker room..."
Starting to believe his own words, Jericho pulls his legs off the table and leans forward on his couch, getting more into his own speech.
"That very same night, I humiliated Kane, ran into his match, and laid him out with my very own Enziguri, cost him that match. I did that, in my very first day in the company. Then you throw Randy Orton and Shawn Michaels in the mix. When that match was announced, you know what I did? Hmm? I delivered a Codebreaker to Randy, faster than he could fall into his whole "oh look at me I'm a snake I'm a snake hisss hiss" routine. Bloodied his face, broke his nose, I'm the reason Randy Orton has zero personality, what was left of it, got rammed face first into my knees!"
Jericho wipes his face and leans a bit more forward, speaking more dominantly and emphatically, with an obvious sense of pride in his voice, he continues to go on.
"And Shawn Michaels, sexy boy, he tried to Super Kick, but I'm quicker than lightning, I caught his leg and locked him in the Walls of Jericho, put my knee right at the back of his head and tugged, till he was screaming for forgiveness, praying that all his sins be washed away before I snapped his back in two and he couldn't walk anymore. "oh I found god" God had him locked in the Walls of Jericho.
So you come in here, and you ask me what I think is going to happen at Devil May Cry, I'll tell you what I KNOW will happen at Devil May Cry. If Randy's face is properly proportioned, if his nose is fixed, I'll wreck it once again. If Shawn Michaels can walk on his own two legs again, and he makes his entrance, gets on his knees and prays to Chris Jericho before he gets in the ring, I'll once again, snap his back in two, and finish the job. And Kane? Once and for all, I'm going to rip that mask off his face and show the entire world, that once again, he's nothing more than a Butter-bean rip off. Why? Because I am The Best In the Wo--"
Just as Jericho's about to finish his sentence, he quickly gets cut off and shot down.
"Oh.My.God. Dad, NONE of that happened. You stole the win on your first night, since then you've done absolutely nothing. All you do is talk about how you're above that stuff, blah blah. You're always on me "hur hur, do good in School son, be a go getter, be the best you can be, make yourself known" You're a hypocrite, and I hope you get choke-slammed straight to heck, Super Kicked, AND RKO'd once again, because you're being a joke. Talk talk talk. Oh look, who am I..."
The kid hops off the couch and grabs his dad's gear, sliding it over his clothes, and posing, speaking mockingly.
"I am the best in the world at what I do. Fozzy Fozzy Fozzy, CM Drunk, Hypocrite, Hypocrite. Tapeworms. Hmm? Hmm? Yea! Ask Him! Ask Him!..."
Jericho quickly stands up off his couch and grabs the camera man by his shirt, pushing him out of his Family Room, to the door and rushing him out of his house.
