Post by The Bradley Clan on Apr 27, 2015 22:02:25 GMT -5
Mike Bradley is at his home in Camden, Maine, browsing GZWA videos on YouTube. Out of morbid curiosity, he pulls up a couple of Chris Matthews promos. As he watches, his reactions range from eye rolling to head shaking to sighing to stifled laughter. He stops the video and kicks his feet up on the table.
“Oh, Chris Matthews… I don’t know what it is about you that makes you so angry. Are you jealous that the bookers haven’t let you into my Television Title match at Devils May Cry? Or are you living up to the horrible stereotype of the easily angered ex-military macho man? I support our troops, but attitudes like yours are exactly why some people are turned off by them.”
"I mean, seriously - this all started after you and Jaser Cruz double-teamed me after I beat you - albeit via DQ - in my first match since regaining the Television Title. Since then you've been acting like you're going to be inserted into my match with Cruz at any moment... and yet it never happens. I know that eats you up inside. You smash my head into the canvas once and all of a sudden you think you're ready to contend for a title? Son, you clearly have no idea how professional wrestling works - run off a few quality wins and THEN we'll talk about making you the number one contender. But I got my hands full with this Drake-worshipping, hashtag-flinging punk Cruz right now, and I don't need your passive aggressive bullshit going along with it!
“Seriously, man, you’re so salty you could preserve a steak for a month! You're so salty I could feed you to an elephant and he'd die of a heart attack! You're so salty you make the Atlantic Ocean look like tap water! And at Primetime, I’m going rub that salt into the wounds in your pride and make you realize that your anger isn't going to get you anywhere in this sport - all it does for you right now is make you my appetizer before the main course of Jaser Cruz mignon at Devils May Cry!"
"You want to watch my legacy burn? Son, I don't need you to fan my flames, because I'm already on fire! I'm the hottest going going in GZWA! I've taken you out the last two shows, and this week is gonna be no different!"
And if you don't know... now you know!
“Oh, Chris Matthews… I don’t know what it is about you that makes you so angry. Are you jealous that the bookers haven’t let you into my Television Title match at Devils May Cry? Or are you living up to the horrible stereotype of the easily angered ex-military macho man? I support our troops, but attitudes like yours are exactly why some people are turned off by them.”
"I mean, seriously - this all started after you and Jaser Cruz double-teamed me after I beat you - albeit via DQ - in my first match since regaining the Television Title. Since then you've been acting like you're going to be inserted into my match with Cruz at any moment... and yet it never happens. I know that eats you up inside. You smash my head into the canvas once and all of a sudden you think you're ready to contend for a title? Son, you clearly have no idea how professional wrestling works - run off a few quality wins and THEN we'll talk about making you the number one contender. But I got my hands full with this Drake-worshipping, hashtag-flinging punk Cruz right now, and I don't need your passive aggressive bullshit going along with it!
“Seriously, man, you’re so salty you could preserve a steak for a month! You're so salty I could feed you to an elephant and he'd die of a heart attack! You're so salty you make the Atlantic Ocean look like tap water! And at Primetime, I’m going rub that salt into the wounds in your pride and make you realize that your anger isn't going to get you anywhere in this sport - all it does for you right now is make you my appetizer before the main course of Jaser Cruz mignon at Devils May Cry!"
"You want to watch my legacy burn? Son, I don't need you to fan my flames, because I'm already on fire! I'm the hottest going going in GZWA! I've taken you out the last two shows, and this week is gonna be no different!"
And if you don't know... now you know!
